Letting go and letting God

5 Apr

So i told myself I’d start writing more, right? And even if my last blog entry here was around five months ago, I HAVE been writing. Just haven’t been publishing it, that’s all 🙂 I’ve often kept my thoughts private and being comfortable with blogging is something I’m still working on. After all, it’s sooo public. 

But it was just Easter Sunday and I figured, why not start anew? Go beyond my comfort zone and maybe, just maybe, it will lead me somewhere else other than the bog I seem to be in now. I’ve always thought I’ve always let Him lead. But I know deep inside I’ve been holding back, refusing to let go of certain decisions and matters.

There’s something infinitely scary about allowing someone else to take the reins and lead your life, control freak that I am. It doesn’t help that I’m listening right now to Orff’s haunting Carmina Burana – O Fortuna, velut luna… The thought of trusting another to lead me somewhere unknown can make me go – “You’ve got to be kidding!”

What if it was all just a waste of time and didn’t lead to the accomplishment of any goal you’ve set out? Time isn’t something you can turn back. Once that minute has passed, you can’t wish for the same minute again. But I think it’s high time I really Let Go and Let God. I only hope I can possess the amount of faith needed to truly, truly make this happen.

Ok, so I’ve switched to Mozart’s more pleasant Piano Concerto No. 21. I need to be listening to something more relaxing.

Happy Easter!

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